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Personality Crisis

It seemed WREG's news team was trying to manufacture a bit of non-existent rage last week when the station ran a poll asking if Memphians thought Cordova High School students should be allowed to cross-dress at school. The poll ran in conjunction with a story about "Gender Bender Day," a silly event that was part of spirit week at Cordova High.

"Some [parents] are finding their daughter dressed like Annie Lennox and their sons shaking it like Madonna," the WREG reporter announced, betraying the station's queer bias. Lennox, after all, is a woman with short hair and a tendency to wear pants while Madonna is a notoriously libidinous long-haired female who wears pants sometimes, but not as often as Lennox. WREG made no mention of Tyler Perry, Eddie Murphy, Robin Williams, Patrick Swayze, or conservative Presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani, all of whom are men who have famously appeared in public dressed in female attire.

Ground Pigeons

WHBQ-TV recently reported that Memphis has a rat problem. And not just any rat problem either, but a rat problem to rival "other worries" such as "crime and money."

A study conducted by rodent experts Dr. Bruce Colvin and Dale Kaukeinen ranked Memphis as the 18th most rat-infested city in America.

Mayor Willie Herenton has yet to explain how the rodent population could swell so high in a region so famous for its snakes.

Instant Poll

Do you think rodents infesting Cordova High should be allowed to cross-dress during homecoming week?

a. Sure, it's good harmless fun (until somebody gets the plague).

b. I don't like it, but as long as nobody contracts plague, I guess it's okay.

c. Cross-dressing makes rodents gay. What part of that don't you understand?

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