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The Cheat Sheet

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Even though Shelby County Commissioner Michael Hooks pleads guilty to extortion charges -- one of several local politicians nabbed in the Tennessee Waltz sting -- he will still be eligible for a generous pension from the city of Memphis. Who says crime doesn't pay?

While Mayor Willie Herenton is eating lunch at a Whitehaven Piccadilly, a gunman robs the cashier and dashes out of the restaurant.

The mayor's bodyguard chases him, but the robber gets away. Hours later, police get a call from a homeowner who is holding the bandit at gunpoint after his dogs flushed him from beneath his house, where the man had apparently been hiding all afternoon. Yep, just a typical day in Memphis.

Memphis Light, Gas and Water locks in a 20-year contract to buy natural gas at a considerable discount, announcing that the deal will save customers money in the future. Call us cynical, but haven't we heard all this before? When we are faced with huge utility bills next year, or the year after, what excuse will they use this time?

Federal agents break up an international drug ring that used Memphis as a major distribution center, an investigation they called "Operation Black Gold Rush." We know that "America's Distribution Center" has been one of our city's slogans for a long time, but we sort of hoped it would attract legitimate businesses.

Jason Bolden, principal of Kirby Middle School, was arrested on Beale Street and charged with assault, disorderly conduct, and public intoxication. Look, this is the way the students are expected to act, not the principal.

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