We would like to share an excerpt from "God Loves the Blacks but Hates Integration: The Whole Truth about Race," a full page advertorial (advertisements that look like articles) that has appeared in The Commercial Appeal on at least three occasions: "One looking for Bible authority for two races to marry each other would be like a blind man, in a dark cellar, looking for a black cat which was not there anyway. ... A prominent black writer once wrote in Black Community News ... 'We shall sodomize your sons. ... We shall seduce them in your schools. ... We shall be victorious because we are fueled with the ferocious bitterness of the oppressed who have been forced to play seemingly bit parts in your dumb shows throughout the ages.'
Okay, that was fake. But if you change "black" and "race" to "gay" and "homosexual," you'll get some sense of what the CA's willing to publish these days if the money's right, as evidenced by an anti-gay full-page ad that ran in Sunday's paper with the title "The Whole Truth About Homosexuality."
Is there some version of Bartlett's Familiar Quotations for sayings that are immortalized for their epic awfulness? If so, then Tameka Gatewood surely deserves the honor. In addition to saying unkind things about her kindergarten students, the recently suspended Raineshaven Elementary School teacher is also responsible for this gem: "If another parent tells me it's my job to teach their children, it's gonna be po-po time."
According to the Bay City News, a man who was struck by a car and killed in San Francisco's South Market neighborhood has been officially identified by the medical examiner as Elvis Presley. No further details were available.