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PET CEMETERY

PET CEMETERY

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The city has trimmed $80,000 in gas bills from its operating budget thanks to a decision to discontinue the practice of incinerating animal carcasses. Now, whenever a beloved pet passes away you have three options: 1) You may choose to break the law and bury the pet in your yard. 2) You may choose the expensive option of hiring a professional service to give your animal a proper, civilized burial. 3) You may turn the body of your pet over to the city, to be buried in a local landfill until radioactive slime from canisters hidden deep within the earth leaks out, reanimating the decomposing carcass and transforming it into a cute, fluffy, soul-sucking demon from hell hungry for human flesh.

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