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The Cheat Sheet

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One week after being reelected,

Mayor Willie Herenton holds a press conference to tell Memphians that crime really isn't as bad here as everybody seems to think. This comes shortly after the FBI ranked our city the most dangerous in the country. Sure, some statistics may show that crime is slightly down from last year, but we still have a long way to go. Schoolchildren are taught that Memphis is located in the state of Tennessee. Now we wonder if our city leaders are living in a state of denial.

Five young women are arrested after spraypainting a horse in Olive Branch. No, they weren't charged with cruelty to animals. The horse is a 12-foot fiberglass statue standing — or prancing — on a ranch in Mississippi. We recall a similar problem several years ago, involving a horse statue that stood atop a Western store on Summer. Good taste prevents us from saying what prominent part of this stallion that vandals painted bright red on a regular basis.

Shelby County schools receives a grant that will allow law-enforcement officers to administer Breathalzyer tests to students at basketball games. Sigh. Has it really come to that? We can remember when the worst thing you could do in a gymnasium was walk across the polished floor in your street shoes.

Two women find a human jawbone sticking out of a sandbar at Meeman-Shelby State Park. Also last week, a hiker finds a human skull in the Wolf River bottoms near Frayser. Sometimes the great outdoors can be more of an adventure than anyone expected.

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